Saturday, November 07, 2015

When We Grief

Words will not express the grief we feel
But by words are how we are made
When God said, "Let there be light,"
And "It's not good for man to be alone," he said
The special people he places us with
Are those we have come to cherish
With whom we spend our time together
But some leave us sooner than we wish
We suddenly become as lonely as we can ever feel
God is with us we know we're told
And yet we feel we can never get away from
The pull of the darkness, the vortex, the hole

Yes, we can, my friend, yes, we can
You may not believe it now
For God is our best companion
It's that simple, that's how
Speak to him, he hears
He is just by your side
You may not see him but feel him
He is with you, before you to confide
Speak to him as you would any other
Your dad beside him is as real as you can imagine
The moment you feel you're going to lose it
Call to Jesus, he listens, so trust in him

And of all the people he has placed you with
As small as we are we're part of it
We feel for you, we're here for you
We're with you in person, in prayer, in spirit
We are all in the Lord
He made us not just one
But he has made us all
To comfort each other as we abide with the Son
So look to Jesus
You are not alone
That's what he promised
With him you'll never ever be alone

All rights reserved © 2015 Pearlie Ng


  1. There are so many levels of grief. Younger folks 'usually' don't get the pain of loss because they have not lost. But sometimes they do. Then there is the grief one experiences every day as they experience loss all over again. Even older folks have a hard time getting this kind of grief.

    In my experience most folks are uncomfortable in helping people grieve because the nature of grief is chaotic and messy. Yet I have also found that people who really listen help the most. When these show up it is like a refreshing breeze or a water that quenches the thirst.

  2. I always feel out of place. I would usually just be there but I was told that it is the only thing you do, to be there. Whatever that is said will not be registered anyway, especially if it was a sudden passing. I must say I have not actually lost someone dear before, but the time will come.

  3. My experience with grief began in my 40s when I lost my first wife. Since then I have officiated at family funerals and have experienced a lot of loss. Yet I have found that some of the hardest forms of loss did not involve death at all. Things like divorce, prodigal children, job loss and disability can be overwhelming.

    I think that simply showing up is really important in the early days of loss. Even more important a few months after loss when a person is coming out of the denial phase. During this time the person is beginning to wrestle with their loss and really needs a loving friend to help them wrestle with the pain of their loss.

  4. Thanks. I learnt two things from you - (1) there is a need to reconnect with those who have lost someone a few months after the loss. The poem was actually written for a friend a couple of months ago when he loss his father and he was so affected before, when his father was dying. Surprisingly, he took it very well after. Now would be a good time to check up on him. Thanks for the reminder.
    (2) That there are other harder forms of loss - I have actually lost my jobs twice and so I can identify with that. But loss of jobs are usually not a known thing, and a lot of people may be suffering very badly in silence except for the people very close to them.

  5. I can relate to that Pearlie. My wife's disability is an ongoing experience of loss. I think that I am doing okay then I see something that reminds me of the days when she could walk. And grief seems to resurface. In those times I have learned to stay in the moment, feel it and experience the comfort of God. Sometimes I sense it more than other times.

  6. The verse is nice and it gives the hope for the better life and Jesus. Come here to be sure Rejoice always!